Sunday, May 3, 2009

Old Friends

photo from

I had the chance to hook up with old friends recently. And when I say "old", I refer to those childhood friends I grew up with, those ones I had my first stick of cigarette with, the members of the Power Triangle way back in high school when we used to cheat during exams. These are the friends I had the privilege of counseling when they ran away from home, when they flirted with their boys, when they first broke their hearts. I still don't understand what design of fate entangled me with them, how I ended up part of them. We were the mean girls at the old high school, the circle of bitches one shouldn't be stupid enough to mess with. Indeed, these girls were crazy. Which is not a huge surprise because I happen to have a strange fascination for crazy people.

And now 12 years later, when smoking becomes disgusting and cheating is abhorrent and everyday you're longing to return to that home you tried so hard to run away from, after several failed relationships (and in my case the consistent absence of one), beautiful children (and in my case the eternally ungratified longing for several), I just realized, some things never change.

Such is the beauty of old friends. You grow up, mess up your life, rise up from the ashes of the fire you ignited on yourself, transform from a mean girl into a well-respected teacher, break your heart countless times until you no longer know that you still possess one, and yet the bond remains unbroken. There's a shared history, something indelible, something that will always be beautiful.

What remains of the old PSHS-MC circa 1997 gang (aptly called "Mangot Gang", which stands for something so indecent, even my open mind will censor it in this blog), is a bunch of grown-up ladies willing to rediscover the world. A lot more mature, a lot less mean, a little more wiser but a bit more reckless too. And thankfully, we are still prepared to fall in love again and again and again, even if the world tramples on our hearts.

After all, as my friend Kodi quips, "Karma stage is over. Meaning begins."

1 comment:

Kodi said...

As forever Miss-Everybody's-Reality-Check, we decided that a mean girl's life has three stages:

1) Misbehaving (bullying everyone),
2) Karma (bad boyfriends and/or husbands or the absence of them - that's you, Jean!)
3) Purpose

Jean, you have been searching for meaning your entire life. Like I said, life is simple and we just tend to overcomplicate it.

In other words, say what you need to say. We had a coaching session of some sort. You know what I mean.

I love you and the rest of the M.A.N.G.O.T. Gang.