Wednesday, August 5, 2009

Signs of the Times

When many of the icons of our generation have died or are dying, this could only mean one thing - we are not getting any younger anymore. This is the age when we've stopped counting. Somebody asks how old we are and we pause before we blurt out the number of years we've been alive. Sometimes we even actually do simple arithmetic. Hmmm, 2009 minus 1980, that's...

Oh yeah. We can't stop time from moving forward. We look at the mirror and there are wrinkles under our eyes and blemishes on our skin. No amount of anti-aging cream can reverse them anymore. Sometimes we become short of breath after running the same distance we used to run effortlessly when we were younger. Sometimes, we wake up with aching backs and knees and fingers. Our blood pressures are rising. There are extra flabs of fat on our arms and tummies that we can no longer claim to be baby fat. Facebook friends and egroup discussions are all about weddings and babies and home improvement. Our colleagues are discussing baby bottles, house mortgages, unreliable yayas and the rising tuition fees in kindergarten schools.

For those of use who are still stuck in extended adolescence, still grappling with issues on intimacy and isolation, struggling with a meager salary, feeding on solitary fastfood meals at the end of a long and busy day, the signs of the times can be alarming and depressing. The world is getting older. Time is running out, and it's not announcing its passing subtly anymore. Alarm signals are being turned on - a tolling bell, an irritating beep of a computer running on low battery, a red light flashing on and off. And we watch them and endure their persistent warning with mouths gaping wide and eyes frozen in fear.

Michael Jackson, whose music we danced to when we were kids, is dead. Cory Aquino, the reason why we wore those yellow shirts while we sat on our dads' shoulders as they were all waving that thumb and pointing finger signal that seemed ridiculous during that time, is to be buried today. Ely Buendia has had two MIs. Nobody uses OHPs and transparencies in class anymore. Everyone around you is either having babies, getting married, settling down, or admitting they're gay.

While you're still alone, stuck in your eternal solitary state, still not getting enough of your life. You still have no one to talk to at the end of the day. You still wonder what is there to live for and why. And when you wake up the next day, you notice the signs of the times, realize how the world is moving so fast, pity your old and solitary self only for a moment, shrug, laugh, hope, and move on with your life anyway.

1 comment:

drrayms said...

"Everyone around you is either having babies, getting married, settling down, or admitting they're gay..." OH NO! kasama ako dito sa category na to!!! hahahahaha... i wish i were having babies!!!